A Thought For Today

In the midst of a thousand bombarding thoughts today that just don't want to seem to end I am teary-eyed. Teary-eyed for souls. And it's really not any different from any other day lately. My heart cries out for the lost. For the unsaved. When God begins to work He doesn't do it in a small way. In fact, He has literally been breaking me. Breaking me from my earthly lusts and filling me with a hunger for Him. In the midst of this brokenness He is growing an unspeakable love for others the kind that He has.

It is most indescribable.

I continue to ache and to hurt for those that just don't see it. My eyes well with tears and concern for the countless lost souls that don't know my God. Those that love Him with their lips but their actions are far from Him. Those that sit in the church pews thinking everything else but about our precious Lord and Savior. Those that have turned away because He just hasn't done anything for them lately.

My heart aches for the people that I have encountered that refuse to have anything to do with me because I dare to tell the truth. Am I so big of a person that nothing will phase me, nothing will bring me down? No. I am not big. But my God and my Savior is and it is His work that I so long to be done through me. I long for freedom from fear and I cry out for the endurance to keep the faith and continue to set out to do what He has commanded and to warn the lost no matter the cost.

He shapes me. He molds me. His work is not complete.

Tagged, Again!

A friend just informed me that I've been tagged! Okay, so it's been a while since I was tagged before which is probably a good thing but I do welcome the "break"! Let's see now if I can come up with eight new things but I may have to borrow a few from previous tag!

And, I won't be able to follow the rules totally! See, same as last time I was tagged nobody I know except my great college friend Lisa and those that all ready tag me have a blog! And, nearly every one I tagged didn't respond anyway. What party poopers!! So, Lisa sorry to do this to ya again! You can skip it if ya want....but Lisa you are tagged! And if some other readers want to do this....please feel free! We would love to know more about you!

Here's the rules:
-- Post eight random facts/habits about yourself. Choose eight others to "tag", and include the guidelines in your post.

-- Let your "taggees" know they've been tagged!

-- Enjoy learning more about your cyber-sisters/brothers.

Here we go:

1. I love to leave tracts everywhere I go. One of my favorite places lately is in credit card machines at restaurants (Sonic is a good one), gas stations, and bank ATM's. You don't have to get creative about leaving tracts! Just put them where ever you are. Yesterday I ran out of one of my most favorite tracts that fits perfectly in the ATM's. It's called the Smart Card and you can get it, as well as countless others, at Living Waters. It makes my day brighter to know that someone may be brought closer to coming to the Lord just by reading a tract!

2. I believe this nation is at a pivotal point. The outcome of this upcoming election I think will reveal a lot about where the Lord is with patience towards us. We all should be on our knees praying that God heals our land and opens the eyes of our people. Our hearts should ache for the countless souls headed to hell.

3. I absolutely love this video that was posted at The Lawman Chronicles. It is a great indicator of where my heart is right now -- to seek and save the lost while there is still time. I definitely look at faces a lot more know. The love that I have for people and the condition of their souls is very important to me. Please watch:


4. While I still have a strong desire to evangelize, God recently has, for a time, been slowing me down from this task. There are several of my acquaintances that are in this same position. Why? Because He is in the process of teaching ME how to be a Christian. While this task will be ongoing until the end, there are some things that I am having to relearn per se. I hope to be doing more posts on this topic eventually.

5. Spiritual warfare. It is out there. Let's train ourselves to be on the alert for the prowling enemy. I am astonished at how much discipline this takes and how inept I have been at pinpointing this as an issue in my daily battles. We are either giving the enemy too much power or we or not focusing on training ourselves to be victorious with the tools that the Lord has provided! More to come on this topic too, I hope!

6. I have given away about 15 - 20 copies of one of the greatest books I have ever read called Way of the Master. I am about to order more and will be handing these out freely again to those that desire to know more about the Lord and His Gospel message and truly want to seek and save the lost. If you haven't read this book I suggest that you do! What is more important to you, your well being with the Lord or an episode of the worldly Desperate Housewives?

7. I just got a new BlackBerry (thanks Mom!)! Wow, how did I ever function without one of these! And, I didn't even sign up for the email capabilities (yet!). Thank the Lord for his wonderful blessings!

8. And last but not least, I wanted to let everyone know that I have the greatest Mom in the world! She raised me to seek after the Lord with my whole heart and I wanted to thank her for planting that seed that is growing strong due to her constant support, prayers and encouragement. What a great thing to see a Mom that loves the Lord with her whole heart through every blessing and struggle. Thank you for standing firm. I love you Mom!

Blessings to all!

Losing Control

Today I am losing control.

I am letting go and letting loose. Finally, I'm seeing it. The control that I want to have of my own life. I see how I want to grip it and squeeze it and shape it into what I think it should look like. I want to wake up and have every day go a certain way. I don't want any hardships, struggles or conflicts. I want it to look perfect even when it's not.

But not anymore. I am losing control.

Discovering new things about yourself can be surprising but sometimes it is not. You know that thing about yourself is in the closet but I don't want to take it out and wear it...even though really I am wearing it. Each day I cinch it around my waist tighter and tighter. I don't want to take it off because it's seemingly holding up my life. I am comfortable with it. I can make it do what I want but I don't dare take it off.

Sometimes God can use the simplest things to reveal the strongholds in my character. A spark of a revelation that takes you somewhat by surprise. You knew something was there that was hindering your closeness and fellowship with the Lord but you couldn't quite put your finger on it. When the revelation comes it's like a new dawn has opened up your heart and exposed it for what it is. This is what I wrestle with. Knowing that there are so many things left to be exposed and I shudder at the thought of it. My fear of God moves me on to be thankful that He is exposing these weaknesses and areas of control.

Lately, one of my prayers has been for strength and endurance. Sometimes the Lord answers in a way that you least expect. While I waited for strength and endurance to come I expected it to crash over me like a wave so that I could feel it, soak it in and rest in it. Instead, God brought trials, although as simple they may seem to some, they ravished me exposing the rotten core on the inside. See, when I was praying for endurance the trials are what he used to bring that to fruition. This of course would not have been my plan of action. That's where I wanted full control.

And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.
(Romans 5:3-5)
I am discovering that not exulting in tribulations can bring unwanted stress. Instead of concentrating on rejoicing through my trials I tend to concentrate on the problem. After all it is human nature to do that isn't it? When I can't control it the way I want it to I begin to worry about how I am going to "fix" the problem instead of relying on God to carry the burden. It can be very difficult when I'm in this situation just to throw it all out there and let God handle it. I am still learning about this process. Although I know to do it sometimes I just don't know always how to do it and this is where feverish and unceasing prayer surface. What I do know that keeps my hope alive in Him is that He will not let his work go unfinished in me!

Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. (Philippians 1:6)
I look forward with open heart and humbleness to that completed work in my life!

What a joy it is to have my Lord and Savior
directing my steps!